Drop Edge of Yonder

Thank goodness I didn’t pit Shaolin monks against anyone in this recent post.

When I get my fifteen minutes, I hope it’s something like this.

Thanks to unexpected torrential rains, the state of the pool had gotten completely out of control. Rocco and I tried to identify and correct the problem.

Rocco: We might need to replace the O-rings.
Me: Oh my God. Not the O-rings. Isn’t that what made the Challenger explode? I don’t want the pool to explode. That would be messy.
Rocco: It won’t be too much of a problem.
Me: Did you know Christa McAuliffe had blue eyes?
Rocco: Really?
Me: Yep. One blew this way and one blew that way.
Rocco: That’s disgusting. Don’t you have any respect for history? Do you even know what Christa McAuliffe’s final moments were like?
Me: [Sheepish.] No.
Rocco: The last thing she said was, “What’s this button do?”
Me: Oh my God. We’re totally going to hell.

Me: I think I’m about to start a period.
Rocco: Girl, you don’t have periods. You have exclamation marks.

I’m not quite sure how it happened, but I was looking at the User List on the WD and ended up at Karma’s profile, which ultimately led me to her online guest book. I barely knew Karma, but I just sat at my kitchen table and cried and cried.

I love my internet friends. *hugs*

I have not had cable for more than two years. In that time, I’ve had to rely on the channels my rabbit ears could pick up for my television viewing pleasure. Interestingly, I’ve been able to pick up only CBS and Fox via rabbit ears, despite having lived in three areas of the state during said time period. Luckily, I’ve been able to find enough shows on those two networks that captured my interest to keep me from suffering from Decent Entertainment Withdrawal, even though I became embarrasingly addicted to Hell’s Kitchen and developed a certain affinity for Criminal Minds. I supplemented my viewing with VHS tapes of Heroes and Lost (Thanks, Sandy!), TWOP recaps of Boston Legal (I love me some William Shatner), and many, many viewings of my Firefly and BtVS DVDs.

Rocco, of course, thought such a set-up was ridiculous and insisted on getting cable. Truth be told, I didn’t fight too hard. Cable is a luxury for one person on my salary, but between the two of us it was more than acceptable; besides, we got the cable/internet combo package, and there was no way I was going to complain about that.

But now….. Well, now I’m a TV whore.

Who knew there was so much entertainment out there? I’d actually lobbied for Dish Network at one point, but the second-tier cable package suits us just fine. Still, I’m a little overwhelmed by all my options. And thanks to Rocco, I’m giving a look to things I’d have never previously considered watching and am finding that, more often than not, I enjoy it. This is where I currently stand with respect to TV:

• Dirty Jobs I’ve seen episodes before when visiting Sandy, but it was only in the last two weeks that I realized the host was not Dennis Quaid. It’s Michael Rowe.

 

• Gene Simmons Family Jewels I love, love, love this show. Specifically, I have an age-inappropriate crush on Nick Simmons. He’s 17; I’m 33. The math just doesn’t add up, but I love him. He’s so witty and sarcastic, and I want him to be my boy toy.

 

• Dog the Bounty Hunter I watched a couple of episodes and thought I would like it, but it’s not very interesting. Besides, Beth’s boobies scare me.

 

• The History Channel I’m obsessed. I can’t help it. When every other channel fails me, I can always find something to watch on the History Channel. Two nights ago I stayed up until five a.m. to watch a special on Vikings. Pirates or Ninjas? Cavemen or Astronauts? Who cares? Vikings kick the most ass.