Archive for January, 2007

Jan

21

Good Times

This is my cousin Kim and her family.

Kim used to have this fabulous life wherein she had an Extremely Wealthy Boyfriend whose parents footed the bill for everything: extended ski holidays, posh apartments, expensive dinners. She was always glammed up and looked spectacular.

At some point Kim and the E.W. Boyfriend were trapped in an apartment in Denver during a blizzard with this guy named Nathan and his girlfriend. By the time the snow cleared, Nathan and Kim were an item.

Now Kim is a wife, mother and midwife. She has this fabulous life wherein she gets to help bring babies into the world and then go home and hang out with her family. She’s always dressed comfortably and looks spectacular.

Nathan, the Husband Unit, is a carpenter and an artist. My favorite story featuring Nathan is about his Mormon mission trip we he got kind of, um, sidetracked. They found him living in a tent in the woods with a giant beer can pyramid. You know, now that I think about it, it’s possible that he told me that story and that it was about one of his friends on a Mormon mission trip. Either way, it’s a good story. Nathan is also a fabulous artist, and someday I hope he will paint something just for me.

Their daughter is Antigone, a very thoughtful and sincere girl who always seems to want to “mother” everyone, but not in that bossy way that some little girls have. Tig seems to genuinely want to take care of other people. Her brother Simon is hilarious, although I see very little of him when he visits because he usually locks himself in a room and watches Cartoon Network non-stop. Poor kid is television-deprived because his parents make him play outside and read books and create things and have conversations. I mean, what kind of person are they trying to turn him into?

Jan

8

Birthday Blues

7:34 pm · category: Uncategorized

Guess what I got for my birthday?

My period.

Yay?

Jan

6

Complimentary Kegel Instruction With Your Next Stay

3:39 pm · category: Hotel Hell

We’ve been exchanging emails at work about a situation involving a screwed up reservation for a guest who wants to spend a lot of money with us. The last email I received from Adelene, the person who first discovered the problem, said, “Maybe we could comp part of Ms. Taylor’s stay due to the incontinence* she suffered because of us.”

I laughed so hard, I peed my pants.

*Adelene meant, of course, the inconvenience the guest had suffered.